My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
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