is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
i now understand why vodka
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
