i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
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