Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
