how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
