I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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