Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
