I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
We need a shit load of segways right now
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
