just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Fuck me I smell like cheese
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