I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Guys Hate When Girls Do These 29 Cringeworthy Things
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
25 Men Confess The Moment They Knew They Wanted To Marry Their Wife
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.