Texts From Last Night

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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.

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  (612): from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend. http://tfl.nu/b39s
  Replies (27) Good night (896) Bad night (1544)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw

  (281): View more from Texas

  I love Texas.

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  (832): Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw (281): I love Texas. http://tfl.nu/eppv
  Replies (48) Good night (4103) Bad night (636)
• Favorite

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  I hope im prettier

  (1-828): View more from North Carolina

  yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying

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  (828): I hope im prettier (1-828): yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying http://tfl.nu/h2yr
  Replies (37) Good night (904) Bad night (3510)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.

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  (918): I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler. http://tfl.nu/ufcl
  Replies (63) Good night (5362) Bad night (1385)
• Favorite

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now

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  (337): He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now http://tfl.nu/rj5l
  Replies (23) Good night (1302) Bad night (4705)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.

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  (703): i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me. http://tfl.nu/nrib
  Replies (29) Good night (1361) Bad night (3770)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20

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  (919): i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20 http://tfl.nu/xo20
  Replies (72) Good night (5648) Bad night (957)
• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?

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  (858): Why do you apologize after every time we have sex? http://tfl.nu/3g2b
  Replies (27) Good night (832) Bad night (8442)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.

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  (540): You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened. http://tfl.nu/x4ak
  Replies (2) Good night (2676) Bad night (929)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.

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  (615): We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers. http://tfl.nu/6a3z
  Replies (6) Good night (2256) Bad night (894)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.

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  (717): Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome. http://tfl.nu/7fz1
  Replies (9) Good night (6255) Bad night (1040)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?

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  (615): I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed? http://tfl.nu/0gei
  Replies (22) Good night (867) Bad night (2689)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad

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  (513): Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad http://tfl.nu/ehr3
  Replies (8) Good night (1117) Bad night (2240)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text

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  (727): idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text http://tfl.nu/1tkt
  Replies (1) Good night (575) Bad night (287)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.

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  (585): There should be a Doritos delivery van or something. http://tfl.nu/p6lg
  Replies (1) Good night (253) Bad night (107)

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