So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
