In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
he wants to bone in the snuggie
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
