And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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