So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize