nut hugger
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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