try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
