so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
