They should really pass out barf bags in church
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
