The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
false alarm, still single
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