Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Last time i carry you out of a forest
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
I currently don't understand fingers.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
