she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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