There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
