The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Randomize