he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
