I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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