super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
