Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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