Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I just forgot I was standing up.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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