I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Randomize
