he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
