is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize