is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
