Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
