I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
This is classic penis vs brain.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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