so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
My ass is underappreciated
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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