ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize