How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
