just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
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