Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
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