What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I'm bleeding and have questions
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
