I must be too annoying 4 u.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Randomize
