susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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