you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize