Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
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