I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
