This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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