rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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