Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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