Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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