If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
