Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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